Sunday, November 27, 2005

Pre-Marital Separation Shocker Of The Decade: Kimberly Stewart, Talan Torriero Decide "It Is Better To Have A Brief Engagement Than A Short Marriage"

What with plush-filled knee-length boots being such a staple of California's young jetset, who'd have guessed that cold feet would turn out to be so very this season!?!

It would be overly cynical to suggest that Kimberly Stewart and Talan Torriero hatched an engage-up-and-break-up scheme to capitalize on the latest wave of aborted wedding plans. But I'm the type of guy who's going to suggest just that. That or David Cronenberg's effects team was called back too soon to accomodate the one-month anniversary of their engagement.

A highlight of MSNBC's coverage of the cancelled engagement is the offhand statement that the pair "announced their engagement earlier this month," which is a pretty funny way to say "eleven days ago" when you think about it. Anyways, here's the official word:
“It was just too soon to enter into a lifelong commitment,” their representatives said in a joint statement. “It is better to have a brief engagement than a short marriage. The couple continue to share their time together and remain open to whatever the future may hold.”
I hereby nominate "Better to have a brief engagement than a short marriage" to replace the dusty, played-out "Better to burn out than to fade away" from here on out.


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