Monday, September 05, 2005

UPDATED: Micronian Queen Hilary Duff Wields Cruel Scepter Of Power Over Teens - And Their Wrecklessly Oblivious Parents

Parents want their daughters to look like the newly-emaciated and fake-toothed Hilary Duff. I know it sounds too bug-fuck crazy to believe, but Old Navy swears it's true.
Every year, retailers and research groups send out reams of information about what parents should be buying their children to wear back to school. Old Navy's survey found, for example, that parents expect to spend $199 per child for back-to-school clothes. They also discovered those parents want their female offspring to dress like Hilary Duff and males to emulate Will Smith. Paris Hilton and Johnny Depp are not considered fashion role models by parents.
Comments on this story at include this enthusiastic outburst from Vicky:
Cool. I have a different style then Hilary's, but I like some of the clothes she wears. (mostly the edgy stuff) Congrats Hill. It's also pretty obvius why parents like her style too, isn't it? Classy, preservative, girly and edgy all mushed together
I'm working on my anger issues, so at this point I'd like to invite the lovely girls of Go Fug Yourself to commence the merciless beat-down of Vicky, readers of Teen People, and the bulk of America's parents.

UPDATE: Hilary apparently found out about the Old Navy survey and is taking it extremely seriously. Page Six reports that while at the VMAs last week, the Queen showed up at the Krieger Cronograph showcase:
[...] she had her eye on a Krieger Gigantium valued at $15,000. After trying on the watches, including a $20,000 model, tempers flared when they realized they could not have those particular items for free. The scene became mayhem.
Way back when, we said it would get ugly. Now, we were just talking about the Hil/LiLo controversy, but it looks like the Duffster has taken things to a whole new level. It's as if she's trying to reclaim her lost fame by emulating her contemporaries. Causing scenes in ritzy boutiques is probably just the beginning. Any day now we might get word of her blowing lines off a Mickey Mouse plate with some unnamed rockstar.


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