Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Contrails: No Sweet Charity For Paris

  • Lil Jon sues Larry Flynt Productions for unlawfully using his likeness in a commercial porn video. Lil's beef (and this is forreals, yo) is that the video "glutted the market" for Lil Jon porno tie-ins, and will prevent him from profiting from smut of his own making.
  • Life Aquatic co-writer Noah Baumbach confirms that he and actress Jennifer Jason Leigh have married. Apparently Baumbach has quite a taste for voice impressions and affected dialects.
  • Paris Hilton is slandered by Shirley MacLaine and Shirley Temple Black. There's not much to report here, and at this point I feel like simply typing the word "Paris" pretty much conveys that someone somewhere is talking some shit about everyone's favorite heiress.
  • Page Six pre-reports on Us Weekly's report on a whole lotta cheatin' goin' on in young Hollywood. Let's see if this works: Paris.
  • David and Victoria Beckham ordered Madrid's Runnymede College to remove all images of their six-year-old son Brooklyn from class yearbooks, with the single exception of the copies received by the Beckhams. A "gray blob" will replace young Brooklyn's face in all of the other copies, leaving a particularly handy place for classmates to write a bunch of heinously hateful things about the lad.
  • Finally, "you don't tell Bob Evans that something is discontinued."

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