Monday, July 25, 2005

Police Recover $12,000 In Swag Intended For Jessica Simpson

From the New York Daily News:
A Jessica Simpson fanatic knew enough about the star to convince companies that she was her rep - scoring freebies that the "Dukes of Hazzard" actress supposedly wanted. But the fraud suspect didn't know enough to use a fake address - leading cops right to her door in East Rutherford, N.J.

Courtney Handel had set up an E-mail account in the name of Simpson's actual assistant, Cacee Cobb, and began trolling for goods, claiming, "Jessica just loves your products," East Rutherford police said. Vendors were happy to send their wares to the 23-year-old public relations intern, including gushing notes in the goodie bags.

"You'd think," said a source close to the investigation, "she would've at least used a Mailboxes USA or something."

Acting off a tip from security personnel at Sony, Simpson's record label, detectives visited Handel's home yesterday. They found her apartment filled with shoes, purses, clothing, lingerie, cosmetics and other goods.

The Frye company had sent seven pairs of boots, Reform jewelry company sent two necklaces and Sweet Soul Designs sent thongs, Frilly Bum Bloomers, Lacy Bosom Cupcake bras and Daisy Duke hot pants - all at Handel's specific requests.

"The list we've compiled so far includes Ted Rossi, Pagliei [Cosmetics and Jewelry], Boscia, Peter Thomas Roth, Cynthia O'Connor & Co., Fake Bake Tanning Products, Phyto Cosmetics and more," Detective Sgt. Jeff Yannaconi told the Daily News. "As we were standing outside, UPS pulled up with 12 more packages. We turned to each other and said, 'If only all our cases could be this easy.'"

Identity fraud is obviously nothing to shrug at, but the write-ups of this story I’ve found have all but glossed over that part. The real crime, it seems, is that she received free swag without being affiliated with any rich or famous people.

I knew a guy who told women in clubs that he was a minor league baseball player to get laid. Nobody was particularly proud of him for this, but neither did I ever hear anyone shedding tears for the poor souls fooled by his ruse. Similarly, I’m not sure how high I can rate Handel’s actions on the criminal scale, duplicitous and unethical as they may be.

Also, does no one verify addresses anymore? So anyway, Jessica Alba loves Puma sneakers, and wants an assortment of free samples in Men's Size 9 1/2 sent to her c/o SDF-1, 555 Thistle Ct, Apt C-413....


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